Have you choked down enough tips on success to make you as stuffed as a Christmas turkey? Good. It’s time to learn about the darkside: being unsuccessful in the new year. Follow us as we mark the trail to being a highly unsuccessful small business person as you come out swinging this January.

Should you happen to see these tips as less than useful, you may use them as a precautionary tale instead and do the exact opposite. This will then make you successful. It’s really up to you.

1) Always leave loose ends

It’s very important at this time of year to make sure you leave as much undone as you can. While a successful person will make sure they have stock ready for the new year, contact clients so they are aware of shutdowns, prepare staff schedules and finalise invoices, an unsuccessful person will have not. Loose ends that need tying up when you get back to work in the new year is a great fast track to being unsuccessful.

2) Never do a SWOT review

Don’t even think about it. Unsuccessful business people excel at neglecting a yearly SWOT analysis. What’s that? A comprehensive¬†review of Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats. Successful people, oddly enough, see this as a necessary step to evaluate the year prior, prepare for the year ahead and become mindful of the strengths and weaknesses of their business plan. Your call.

3) Don’t appreciate your employees

To ensure a middling year ahead, be sure to neglect your employees. After all, what have they done for you lately? Many believe success involves demonstrating appreciation to your employees at year end through extra leave days, gifts, Christmas parties etc. But this will only make them like you more and lead them to becoming more dedicated employees for the year ahead. Decide if this is best for your business.

4) Old websites are good websites

There is nothing that will make you more unsuccessful quicker than out of date websites and social channels. To achieve the pinnacle of un-success, one must stay behind the 8 ball at all times and never pursue modernity. You can sit smugly as you watch the successful business people around you update their site’s navigation and UX, refresh branding, keep on-trend with their social channels and revise their SEO strategy. With your focus trained on being unsuccessful in the new year, however, you won’t need to engage in all that hassle.